Thursday, November 6, 2008

In The Moment (published in Six Sentences)

It hasn’t always been this way but you can’t remember a time in the past few years when there wasn’t some sort of tension between you, so when he tells the waitress he’s only having coffee you know in that moment that whatever time you have together tonight will be too short. Once he made the commitment to meet it was a race against the clock – in his mind he has already determined how much time he’ll devote to you; with no crisis looming your allocation of minutes will be brief. Long enough for a cup of coffee, some stories about nothing too important, and vague promises about getting together again, followed by quick good-byes. There are so many things you want to tell him, like how the best times in your life were the days when you walked through the front door, dead tired from a two hour commute out of Penn Station and a job you hated and he and his sisters would scream, “Daddy!” at the sound of the key in the front door. How they would race down the hallway and leap into your arms before you could even drop your briefcase on the floor, and how that little boy made you feel special with his own display of love and affection every time he saw you. But that little boy is left only in memories you draw on now to fill the void in your heart where you both used to dance and play together; replaced by a stranger, and a distance you can’t cross.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Leatherdykeuk said...
That was really sad. Beautifully presented.

Saturday, February 9, 2008 4:14:00 PM EST

insearchofhemingway said...
Wow. What power in six sentences - in every story you write, the words strike such strong emotional chords. Well done and heart-breaking.

Saturday, February 9, 2008 4:38:00 PM EST

Tara said...
I want to reach out and help save their relationship. Wonderfully told; the distance between them is palpable.

Saturday, February 9, 2008 6:10:00 PM EST

Adam J. Whitlatch said...
Beautifully sad and tragic. Masterfully written. For the first half I was convinced it was going in a completely different direction. Bravo. :)

Monday, February 11, 2008 8:32:00 AM EST

Joe said...
A painful, yet beautiful six. I agree with Adam's comments, I thought it was going somehwere else and then like the truly great writer he is, Mr. Michaels pulls it all together in his wonderful prose style.

Monday, February 11, 2008 11:40:00 PM EST

Kevin Michaels said...
Thanks to all for your comments. This was a bit of a personal 6S for me and writing it touched a few raw edges within. Your comments mean a lot-
Best - KM

Tuesday, February 12, 2008 10:55:00 AM EST